I Am the Man

Math. Not exactly a strong suit for me. But my love for fantasy sports can make me do extraordinary things.

This is the first year the KB Friends and Family Hockey League (TM) will be hosted by ESPN's fantasy hockey platform. In fact, I think this is the first year they're doing fantasy hockey in Bristol. I was very impressed with how robust* the platform is, supporting an endless array of customizable options, including league and draft formats that Yahoo can't even touch. For example, if I had a stable of 9 hard core managers, I could make this a keeper league. You can create divisions, customize the schedule on a week-by-week basis, choose from 5 different scoring formats and playoff criteria, etc. You also get free real time stat tracking, something you have to pay $10 for with Yahoo.

In awe of this brave new world of variables, I decided that I would break my league up into two divisions (Crosby and Ovechkin) and create a schedule similar to the NHL's: Every team plays each intra-divisional rival three times and each extra-divisional opponent twice. The idea is to foster rivalries and hopefully create a little competitive balance.

Creating this schedule was not easy in word, nor was it easily done. After several swings and misses at finding a free, functional schedule generating software on the interwebs, I opened up a blank Excel spreadsheet and dusted off the old math engine. The thing hasn't been taken out for a spin since the spring of 2002, so it took several tries to get it to turn over. Over three hours later, though, I had my schedule. Granted, the more mathematically inclined could have probably completed this in less than 30 minutes, but I believe I still deserve a hearty pat on the back. I won't go into the boring details of it, save that there are 10 teams, each represented by a letter (A-J). Each row is a week, each column is a game slot, making each box a matchup consisting of two teams. No two letters repeat themselves in any given row. I rule.

	Game 1	Game 2	Game 3	Game 4	Game 5
1	) AB	CD	FG	HI	EJ
2	) EI	BD	GH	CJ	AF
3	) AC	BE	HJ	FG	DI
4	) AD	EF	CI	HJ	BG
5	) AE	BF	DJ	GI	CH
6	) GI	BH	AC	FJ	DE
7	) AJ	BF	CG	DH	EI
8	) AI	BJ	CE	DG	FH
9	) AG	DF	BC	IJ	EH
10	) AB	CF	GJ	EH	DI
11	) BC	AD	FJ	HI	EG
12	) FJ	AH	BE	DG	CI
13	) GH	BD	AE	IJ	CF
14	) GJ	BI	AE	DF	CH
15	) AI	BJ	FH	CD	EG
16	) AJ	BH	CG	FI	DE
17	) AG	FH	CE	BI	DJ
18	) AB	CD	FG	HI	EJ
19	) BC	DE	GH	IJ	AF
20	) AC	BE	FI	GJ	DH
21)	AD	CE	FI	HJ	BG
22	) CJ	BD	AH	GI	EF

*"Robust" is easily my favorite BS word in the English lexicon. Having come from a marketing/sales-ish backround, I've come to appreciate the meaningful meaninglessness of this word. No other word says "it's really good with lots of stuff" the same way "robust" does. When in doubt, always say "robust."