Fantasy Sports

Reality. Let's not fool ourselves. Fantasy sports are very much a part of our everyday reality, at least for some of us. I like to think that I'm on the more extreme end of fantasy managers. In 2007, I finished the year with three football teams, three hockey teams, and about a half dozen pick'ems between NCAA and NFL football and NCAA basketball. I have a first place finish in hockey and a second place finish in football to show for all of that work.

This year, I boast four football teams (two of which are keeper leagues), a baseball team (currently 24 games ahead of the competition), and most likely 3-4 hockey teams, one of which I will run myself. It may look like a lot of work, and it is, but two things drive me: The glory of winning, thus boosting my yahoo rating, and the Christmas morning-like thrill I get from live fantasy drafts.

It goes without saying how good it feels to use your foresight and analytical skills to show up the people you compete against in these leagues, whether it is a group of friends or a random league you joined or got invited to. Winning doesn't just mean picking the right players but using them correctly, paying close attention to matchups and hot and cold streaks. Admittedly, blind luck also plays a part in one's fantasy league success, but doesn't that feel just as good? If you don't think so, imagine winning the lottery and pocketing $100 million for doing absolutely nothing besides standing in line at Krauszer's for ninety seconds while the guy in front of you collects the change from his purchase of Penthouse and chew.

For me, though, fantasy drafts can be just as fulfilling, if not more so, because they represent the unadulterated perception of victory 8 months before it even happens. I can't count how many times I've logged back on to my team page weeks after the draft yet still before the start of the season and just admired the team that I just drafted. In fact, I was doing it earlier today. And because I can't resist...

Stinkin' Root Beer

1. (6) Joseph Addai
2. (7) Larry Johnson
3. (18) Peyton Manning
4. (19) Antonio Gates
5. (30) Santonio Holmes
6. (31) Anquan Boldin
7. (42) Devin Hester
8. (43) Nick Folk
9. (54) New York
10. (55) Jamal Lewis
11. (66) David Garrard
12. (67) Chris Cooley
13. (78) Kevin Curtis
14. (79) Jerricho Cotchery
15. (90) Rob Bironas

This is obviously not a deep league. Only six teams with not so many roster spots. I don't care. I love looking at the stacked roster that I just put together. For something a little more in-depth, here's a league with way more teams, roster spots, and individual defensive players...

Tabata This!

1. (1) LaDainian Tomlinson
2. (20) Tony Romo
3. (21) Braylon Edwards
4. (40) Jonathan Stewart
5. (41) Fred Taylor
6. (60) Dallas Clark
7. (61) Calvin Johnson
8. (80) Kevin Curtis
9. (81) Mike Vrabel
10. (100) Stephen Gostkowski
11. (101) Ed Reed
12. (120) Adam Jones
13. (121) Nick Barnett
14. (140) Antonio Cromartie
15. (141) Michael Boley
16. (160) David Garrard
17. (161) Mario Williams
18. (180) Roman Harper
19. (181) Calvin Pace
20. (200) Deuce McAllister
21. (201) Leon Washington
22. (220) Ted Ginn Jr.
23. (221) James Hardy
24. (240) Roderick Hood
25. (241) Tim Hightower

The first Dance of Joy moment probably comes when I first enter the draft room and find out what position I will be drafting from. I have to admit, I don't always look forward to getting the first overall pick. For instance, I was disappointed to learn that I had first overall in the league immediately above because I didn't want to have to choose between Ladanian Tomlinson and Adrian Peterson. The 2nd overall pick was far and away the best pick to have in any football draft this year. Hockey will be a different story this year, though. If I get the first overall pick in any one of my hockey leagues, before picking Alexander Ovechkin without any hesitation whatsoever, I'll be as surprised and happy as this guy. Anyone out there want to be my studio audience?

One of the auxiliary joys of fantasy sports is devising witty team names. Obscure movie quotes and pop culture references are always winners. Here are my ten best fantasy sports team names.

10. Maurice DuBois
9. Broccoli Rabe
8. The Ab Abbers
7. Hundreds of Stuff
6. Stinkin' Root Beer
5. The Holy Rollers
4. The Frickin' Fracks
3. Enflamed Kaspar
2. Dueling Ted Knights
1. Flow Me

Honorable Mention
Puttin' On the Foil
Sather's Cigar

League registration doesn't start for fantasy hockey until the end of the month, but I've already been ranking my players and simulating drafts. And to think some league members want to add some financial incentives. This is going to be a good year.